Most parents view playing as a waste of time. They would like a child to grow out of the love for playing and get into more serious things like studies, research, or even household chores. It seems more like a childish behavior that must be tolerated, and the sooner it is over the better. However Islam is a balanced religion. Play is an important part of growing up, and is vital for the physical and emotional development of the child. Play is the first source of learning basic social skills necessary for life.
A child loves to play, and it is a form of punishment for the child to be deprived of playtime. This desire to play, anywhere and with anything, is most evident in the early years. It is a sign of emotional and physical health. A child who does not Continue Reading…
Here are some quick don’ts in religious training.
Don’t do it harshly. Getting angry with the child and forcing them leads to resentment. It is better to explain, and discuss with the child.
Don’t overdo it. Teach religion in moderate doses. Overdoing it can be harmful and can be a burden for Continue Reading…
Amongst the clearest examples of Islam’s honoring women is the great status of the mother in Islam. Islam commands kindness, respect and obedience to parents. Islam raises parents to a status greater than that found in any other religion or ideology. Below are a few words about a mothers love for her child.
Mother’s love is countless and meaningful. Her kindness is hardly repaid by any precious things in this world. Her deep parental kindness in bringing Continue Reading…
The Importance of Spending Quality Time with Your Children
By Abu Atiyyah, South Africa
Bismilllah
Has your home become like a hotel? Has the concept of family become a fond memory?
The home of today has become very much like a hotel. Strangers stumble in and out at odd hours, each one doing his own little thing. “The family” has now almost become just a fond memory. “The family” having meals together is a rare occasion. Just sitting together and chatting is even more rare. Part of the blame can be apportioned to the fast, demanding pace of life in the modern and “advanced” world we are living in. The other part can be attributed to the lack of will and the apathy on the part of members of the family to Continue Reading…
At about the age of about 5 or 6 of a child’s life, more of the concepts of Islam can begin to be taught in greater detail. Young children may know the name of Allah and his attributes and be happy to say them, but they cannot really comprehend the idea of an Omnipotent, All-Encompassing God that takes care of them and loves them.
As they mature, children will begin to understand this and realize the importance of their relationship with their Unseen Creator. It is necessary as parents to teach them about the significance of pleasing Allah, subhanahu wa ta’ala, in all that they do. This is, in fact, the goal of Islam, which is submission to Allah’s plan and guidance. It should also be emphasized that doing this is to their benefit as well because it is through this obedience that they receive Allah’s grace and blessings. Connected with this are the rewards that Continue Reading…
Below is an example of a child hearing the words of Allah and being instantly moved by them. It is narrated by Ibn al-Jawzi and is as follows:
There was a king who had a lot of wealth, and he had a daughter and no other children. He loved her very much, and he used to let her enjoy all kinds of entertainment. This went on for a long time. Beside the king there lived a devoted worshipper, and whilst he was reciting one night, he raised his voice saying,
“O you who believe! Ward off yourselves and your families against a Fire (Hell) whose fuel is men and stones ” [al-Tahreem 66:6 - interpretation of the meaning].
The girl heard his recitation and said to her servants, “Stop!” But they did not stop. The worshipper started to repeat the verse, and the girl kept telling them to stop, but they did not stop. Continue Reading…
Today we’ll be looking at the all-important topic of imparting Islamic identity to our children in the West. Obviously, the parents themselves should have a strong Muslim identity but there are additional important points to be kept in mind.
In developing their Muslim identity we have to naturally impress upon our children that our ways are quite different from those of the rest of the western society. But this should not be done in such a way as to create hostility towards the western society as a whole. This can create emotional conflict in a child. The Holy Qur’an says of the people of the book that “they are not all alike” (3:113) and it praises some of their good qualities along with condemnation of what is wrong with them (5:85-87, 57:27, etc.). Continue Reading…
While this site mainly deals with how to raise children and the responsibilities of parents, we thought it would it also be useful to also have a category about the rights and status of parents in Islam. So in this post, we want to briefly mention the major sin of disobeying parents. As parents, this is something we should teach our children - not only for our personal gain, but to avoid children from committing a major sin.
We shouldn’t raise our children to be “scared of us” and that’s the only reason they don’t disobey us. Rather we should instil the fear of Allah in their hearts and as part of this, they should know that Allah does not like them to be disobedient to us. A child’s fear of their parents will eventually reduce as they get older, but the fear of Allah should always be there, and this is what we should base our teachings on in this regard.
In Islam, it is the right of parents that their children should treat them with kindness, obedience, and honor. Devotion to parents is a natural instinct which must be strengthened by deliberate actions. Continue Reading…
A little boy came up to her mother in the kitchen one evening while she was making some food, and he handed her a piece of paper that he had been writing on. After his mum finished what she was doing , she read it, and this is what it said:
For cutting the grass: $5.00
For cleaning up my room this week: $1.00
For going to the store for you: .50 Continue Reading…
It is a good idea to pray in front of your small children. This will get them used to the actions and the regularity in which it is done. Many times, children will imitate their parents when they pray and other times they might playfully climb on their parents. So what should we do when children are climbing on us during prayer?
Below is a fatwa from Sheikh Muhammed Salih Al-Munajjid which explains the situation. SubhanaAllah, it also demonstrates the gentle and compassionate nature of the Prophet (peace be upon him). The question is as follows, Is there a sunnah of the holy prophet regarding him allowing children to climb upon him during prayer and Continue Reading…
As Muslims, we should take the Prophets as our example in everything that we do. This includes parenting. One of the best examples of parenting mentioned in the Qur’an is that of the advice given by Luqman (peace be upon him) to his son. Many articles have been written about this advice but today we want to focus on one aspect. Insha Allah we will discuss others in later posts.
In the below verse, we see Luqman describing some of Allah’s Might:
“O my son! If it be equal to the weight of a grain of mustard seed, and tough it be as a rock, or in the Heavens or the earth, Allah will bring it forth. Verily Allah is subtle in bringing out that grain, well aware of its place.” [Qur'an 31:16]
We should keep in mind that the knowledge of Allah is the most excellent Continue Reading…
The Ummah is deeply indebted to the efforts of the great luminaries of Islam. Everyone pays tribute to the Muhadditheen, Mufassireen, Jurists and Mubaaligheen for their exemplary efforts and services to Deen. However, most people are unaware of the fact that many of these great sons of Islam were brought up entirely by their mothers. It was the mother’s efforts in moulding their character and personality that eventually prepared them for the great task that they performed later in life. Thus, great tribute should be paid to these silent mothers for the foundational role that they played. Continue Reading…
A positive attitude is very important as inshaAllah, it will make our life easier. In life, not everything goes as smoothly as we want it to be. This is the nature of this world - it is a testing ground. There will be times when we will face problems and obstacles. The most challenging part is not when our life goes smoothly but how we react when we experience problems and difficulties. We should be grateful to Allah at times of ease and patient in times of difficulty. And we should always put out trust in Allah.
As Muslim parents, the benefits of having a positive attitude should also effect our approach to raising children. With this in mind, below are some very simply points that we should Continue Reading…
It is widely known that one of the best things you can do for your teen is to simply be there for them. The gift of time and attention is more valuable than any material thing you can give them.
As parents, we should be there for our teens. This means taking an active interest in their activities (go to their sports events, school functions) and try to include them in yours (taking them to the mosque, their relatives etc). It may be difficult depending on how many children we have, but we should try and set aside specific times for one-on-one activities and give them your undivided Continue Reading…
It is rare for people to live together under one roof without any arguments, but reconciliation is better and correcting oneself is a virtue.
What shakes the unity of the family and harms its infrastructure is when conflicts are brought out into the open before the members of the family, who then split into two or more opposing camps, not to mention the psychological harm that is done to children, especially little ones. Continue Reading…
These days, there are many Muslim homes that, although they are occupied with people, they are in fact, dead. This is because there is no remembrance of Allaah, as mentioned in the following hadeeth.
The Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said:
“The likeness of a house in which Allaah is remembered and the house in which Allaah is not remembered is that of the living and the dead, respectively.”
Rather than a place where Allah is remembered, the Muslim home has become a place where Continue Reading…
It may sound weird, but raising children begins with choosing a spouse. That is because raising children is a team effort between two people and who you choose, will have a big effect on how your children turn out.
A good example often given is that of seeds and land. If you want healthy trees and ripe fruits, you should search for fertile land. It would be a silly person to plant seeds in barren land or low quality soil and expect good results. The same applies for raising children. Continue Reading…
Keeping ties between relatives is something very important in Islam. There is an increasing number of ways to communicate in today’s technological age, yet the gap between the new tech savvy generation and the older generation is growing.
In the below verse of the Qur’an, we see the community focus in Islam and the emphasis on maintaining ties with relatives: Continue Reading…
Children like anyone, will experience anger at some point. We need to understand that anger is inherent in human nature and as parents, we should understand more about the concept of anger and how to manage it in our children.
The first thing we should note is that anger is not “all evil” and that how anger is channelled is important. Anger actually has some benefits when “used” for the right reasons. For example, anger can be a useful instrument when defending oneself, religion, honour as well as the keeping the Muslim lands safe from the plots of the aggressors. When anger is used in this way, it is a commendable thing; however we should note that anger is not the same as being irrational or unjust. The type anger referred to above is not the anger we are considering today.
In more than a few verses in the Qur’an, Allah commands us to repress anger and repel evil for that which is better. For example: Continue Reading…
The most effective way to teach anything to anybody is by example, that is, to be a good role model. This is why Allah sent human beings as Prophets to all peoples.
The Prophet (peace be upon him) was the best of examples, as Allah says:
Truly, in those there is an excellent example for everyone who puts their hopes in Allah and the Last Day.
Qur’an 60:6
We need to understand that our children, especially when they are young, will learn how to behave by watching what we do. Continue Reading…